Girl Talk Book Study WEEK THREE

Better late than never, right?! I’ve been a teensy bit busy and got behind on our book study.  I swear, once May 1^st hit, it all started going downhill. Ha! 

Seriously, I love my job but the end of the year is just a killer. Meetings, testing, special activities oh my!

So, moving on…Week 3: Where have all the good people gone?  

This week was just as riveting as the previous weeks. God definitely spoke to me in so many ways. I got slapped around a bit and totally convicted.

Day 1: Unsafe People

This hit several nerves.  Real talk: I’ve dealt with mean girls my entire life. Really, it wasn’t easy being the ummm “fluffy” girl growing up.  I definitely dealt with my fair share of teasing and being left out. I think when you go through that so many times, you just make friends with anyone who will accept you. Sometimes those people are the “unsafe people”.  Jen talked about three types of unsafe people and I could identify with each.  I think during different seasons of my life, I was drawn to different forms of brokenness.

Day 2: Safe People

Praise God for great friends. Luckily I made a few amazing lifelong friends in High School. They are still my best friends today. Safe friends exist and Jen is right, they are a treasure. I also love where she talks about “a safety that only exists among believers.”  Don’t get me wrong, I have been hurt by believers. Of course I have. All people are sinners. Again, this is why my faith cannot be in people and only in God. But, my safe people are believers because they do function in forgiveness, mercy and grace…all things I need but most definitely do not always deserve.  Safe friendships are necessary because they build you up instead of tearing you down. They encourage you and push you to be accountable to God’s calling on your life. Safe friendships provide a security for your heart when you can’t find it anywhere else. I need safe friendships in my life and I’m pretty sure I’m not the only one. I need to be around people that will draw me closer to God. I hope that my friends consider me a safe friend. This day helped me to be more thankful for the safe friends in my life.

Day 3: What Not To Do

The first sentence of this day was “Choosing the right friends to speak into our lives will make or break the journey.” Yes, yes and yes! Let’s be real friends, our journey is full of many seasons and some of those seasons are H.A.R.D.  Walking alone is the same as walking with unsafe people. Granted, we are never alone. God walks before us and with. Shoot sometimes he is carrying me or dragging me kicking and screaming. Jen talks about three poor strategies. Doing too much spoke to me the most. I am good at overextending myself. People ask me all the time how I do it all and my answer is simple, I don’t. I’m a good mom today, a good wife tomorrow, etc. Balance is SO HARD.  When I feel led to do something, I throw myself into something wholeheartedly sometimes to the point of ridiculousness.  I can get so busy or wrapped up in something that I forget to connect to people. People are the center of all things. Connections are what makes us go round.  I may be pretty cool {not really} but totally not cool enough to go on this journey alone. Connection has to be a priority. I want to know more than your name. I want to know your heart.  That was a great lesson Jen reminded me of on this day!

Recognizing my faults in using these poor strategies was eye opening.  I pray God shows me my weaknesses and gives me discernment as to how to change my relationships so I am connecting with the people because of his divine appointment.

Day 4: This Is The Beginning Of A Beautiful Friendship

Jen cracked me up with her opening story. I love how she compared beginning friendships is like the beginning stages of dating. This is SO true.  Both are equally awkward.  Conversation starters and getting to know you questions…awkward. Ha! Or maybe that is just me. It’s exciting. I’ve met people and thought..Ohhh, we should be best friends. That may appear a little stalkerish lol. This day gave me much encouragement. We need not be afraid to open our doors to new friendships and most importantly we need to be okay to be ourselves.  My favorite line of this day was “The Christian woman swims upstream, with the tidal waves of culture against her. We can’t leave each other to swim alone.” Oh. My. Goodness. I couldn’t agree and love this statement more. Fellowship, friendship, comradery are vital to our peace of mind, support and happiness.  Anyone who says that do not need anyone is not being honest with themselves.

Day 5: Dig In: Betrayed

Oy. This is hard. Thinking about the holes people leave in our hearts is something no one wants to deal with.  It’s easier to ignore and pretend it didn’t happen than allow yourself to feel pain.  But a hole left open is just that.  Forgiveness is not only for the person who hurt you but forgiveness is for yourself too. Let’s be honest, most of the time when we get hurt, we are the only one sitting at home in our own despair.  Betrayal Betty (no offense to all Betty’s, that my grandmother’s name and I loved her) is not losing sleep over your grief or the big hole she left in your heart when she hurt you. Forgiveness is for you in the sense that you are not allowing that person to steal your joy.  When you live in that place of hurt, you let them to continue to hurt you over and over.  They steal every moment of God’s planned joy for your life.  Forgive them and be set free. Don’t give anyone that kind of power over your life.  No one is worth losing your joy.  You can forgive the broken and God can heal your brokenness. Remember, we cannot put our faith in people because we are ALL sinners.  God calls us to forgive as we have been forgiven and even though that is so hard to do, it comes with a freedom and empowerment that lets you take back your peace.  So, buy Felicia. Ha! Seriously, you are too important to kingdom to walk around with a heart that looks like swiss cheese.

Next week is The Gift Of Gab. Oh, I have this one in the bag. Ha! I hope she doesn’t try to tell me that I talk too much. I could be in trouble here. I kinda love words. Clearly this is not new information. I’ll be back later this week with Week Four. I hope you are enjoying this ride. It’s okay not to comment about your reflections because all of this is so personal.  Clearly, I am an open book to fault.  I just think that it’s important to be transparent so people know how real my life is and that it’s okay to be a hot mess because God still loves me. Thanks for reading this long post. Praying God blesses you this week with great discernment about your friendships in your life. I pray you find safe friends and I pray that you are open to meeting the people that God places in your path to help you walk this journey.

I’ll leave you with this sweet picture of my daughter and I. Grace is 18 and for Mother’s Day she scheduled a Mommy & Me photo shoot. How sweet is that? We asked if we could do a picture of us praying because really God is the glue in our life. Our family is highly dysfunctional but God helps us keep it together. This is our only sneak peak and I can’t wait to see the rest of the pictures. We took some pretty funny ones…because that’s how we role! Ha! This was taken by the amazing Twenty Toes Photography. If you live in Central Texas, Trilby is AMAZING!!

Love and virtual hugs!!